"Getting old sucks." I hear that all the time. Especially working in healthcare. "Enjoy it Sonny, one day your body will fail you and you'll be lucky to keep it up long enough to drain your bladder, much less the other thing." Okay, they don't usually call me Sonny. The point is, when you're younger, you don't think about it. You're more concerned with eating whatever Dorito/Mountain Dew product is out, staying up all night, and challenging fate with every step. Then it begins to creep up. For me, the first sign was my hair retreating from my forehead at 25. What utter betrayal. Did you really want to be combed more? I thought you hated that, bastard locks. I gave you countless bottles of $1 Suave shampoo and hell, I wore a hat and nothing but a hat for years... You know what, nevermind, let's move on. The body was the next to go. Back in the day I could play basketball for hours, eat lunch, then go back for more. Now I have to decide if the hour I did play will give me a headache from exertion and if I'll need some kind of pain reliever so I'll be able to sleep that night. At least Dad Bods are a thing now. They kinda always have been, haven't they? We just didn't call them that. I'm glad we have a nicer term than "beer gut" or "creeping death of getting old." Now it's Dad Bod and maybe even DILF if you've really got it going on. The thing I've found most important as I cross my 30s, gracefully or not, is learning that you don't have to care. (yes I said old and 30s in the same sentence, but 18 year-olds agree and 50 year-olds are like, "Just wait, Sonny." It's all relative) Not caring is the best part of getting old. "That's not the latest fashion. No one wears jorts anymore." Well, I do and it's the same pair I've been wearing since I was 18. They either used to be big on me or they stretched with the introduction of the Dad Bod. What's a more important thought is how many years of booty-sweat they've endured. Impressive material I'd have to say. If you learn anything by being older, it's that the not caring frees you up to finally be yourself. Hopefully it's a you you can be proud of. Hopefully your opinion on what's worth being proud of has shifted as well from just being good looking or rich to how well you can light a charcoal grill and cook a steak. After all, Dad Bods take work.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorScott writing the things that come into his head. Archives
January 2021
|